John McCain: The Clarification Express

by BarbinMD

Sat May 03, 2008 at 10:04:54 AM PDT

We often hear about news outlets slashing their budgets and downsizing their operations in an effort to save money, but there's one thing that the traditional media really needs to invest in and that's a dictionary, because it doesn't seem like they know what the word "clarify" means.

Twice in the past two days, the media has reported on outrageous or downright disturbing claims made by John McCain on the campaign trail to whip up the faithful, and then have described his backpedaling as "clarifications," rather than the flip-flopping, damage control that they are. On Wednesday, McCain said:

The bridge in Minneapolis didn't collapse because there wasn't enough money. The bridge in Minneapolis collapsed because so much money was spent on wasteful, unnecessary pork-barrel projects.

That's pretty clear, right? A definitive statement that the bridge collapsed because of pork barrel spending. But after the national co-chairman of his campaign, who also happens to be the Governor of Minnesota, objected, McCain was allowed to clarify and say what he really meant was:

...only that earmarks divert money from necessary projects toward unneeded pork-barrel ones.

Obviously we all misunderstood when he said "the bridge collapsed because..." And then yesterday McCain said:

My friends, I will have an energy policy that we will be talking about, which will eliminate our dependence on oil from the Middle East that will prevent us from having ever to send our young men and women into conflict again in the Middle East.

My friends, that's a straightforward statement. But damn, it does sound bad. So the media allowed him to clarify it:

No, no, I was talking about that we had fought the Gulf War for several reasons.

Oh, he meant that other war...the one we fought 17 years ago. Well, sure. It's a shame that "the word 'again' was misconstrued." Because he certainly never meant that it's happening today...or that it's ever happened before.

"Again" doesn't mean again, "the bridge collapsed because," doesn't mean the bridge collapsed because, black is white, up is down, move along, there's nothing to see here...and the straight talking, moderate, maverick express rolls on.

And of course there are other issues that have popped up during this campaign that McCain hasn't had to clarify, but that's only because the media chooses to ignore them. But if they ever finish writing that novel and get back to doing their day jobs, perhaps they could get McCain to explain:

• What he meant when he said, on three occasions, that Iran was training Sunni extremists to fight in Iraq? Since he is the self and media appointed foreign policy candidate, it would be nice to know if he's aware of the difference between Sunnis, Shiites, and their respective relationship with Iran.
• Which of Reverend John Hagee's positions does he endorse? That the Catholic Church is a cult that conspired with Hitler, that Hurricane Katrina was a just punishment for the people of New Orleans, that America is cursed and doomed, or that abortions are available in public schools?
• Why he is now saying that the "Mission Accomplished" banner was a mistake when in 2003 he cited it as proof that the conflict was over?

And if that's too much hard work for the media, can they at least ask McCain to clarify exactly how many years he is willing to have American soldiers attacked, wounded or killed in Iraq? So far we only know for sure that it's less than a 100 years.